Wilted Efflorescence
by Rileyyheartt
Summary: Efflorescence: The state or period of flowering, an example or result of growth and development. She lost everyone, and nothing would be the same. They convinced her to go back. To change things. But how could she, when all she knew was lost? She was alone in her burden. A burden to save them all, wilted, and washed in the blood of her loved ones. Rated M (because I got graphic)
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any franchise, unfortunately.

Efflorescence: The state or period of flowering, an example or result of growth and development.

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They lost.

They had lost so totally and completely that almost no one was left.

Even their contingency plan still wasn't finished.

Naruto was the mastermind behind such an amazing seal, with the help of Kurama and some notes on space-time sealing that Kakashi had... but now it was untouched. Almost complete, but what was she supposed to do? The war had dragged on for years as they slowly lost more and more people to Madara's plans.

The seal was meant to send all of them back. Before some of the most important events that led to now could happen.

The others had given up. Even Shikamaru, with all of his genius, sat broken and defeated. Choji's corpse slowly rotting next to him. Decompositon at a middle stage, where his flesh was infested with maggots and the eye he had left rotated slowly before seemingly melting in on itself, causing the fluid to poor our of his eye socket and over the blood stained yet visable nasal bone.

The stench of death was pungent and consuming. Ino had died long ago... and team 7... team 7 was no more.

The last of her hope began to rot away slowly, there was nothing she could do for the bright-eyed man she was clutching desperately. She was never strong enough for them, her boys, she had always watched their backs as they grew in strength. She strived to walk with them, but could never completely catch up.

For a while, she was okay with that.

Until the war started.

Before, even though Sasuke had left the village, she had been okay.

She wasn't great.

She doubted she ever would have been great again, but she was okay.

Then the war started and comrade after comrade fell. Her hands were always covered in the blood of those she loved.

She wished it had been her enemies blood instead.

Before Naruto had been Sasuke, before him, their sensei. And even now, as the last of her boys was bleeding to death in her arms, she could do nothing about it.

"Don't cry, Sakura-chan" A sad smile crossed his face, it was covered in grime and blood and more just kept pouring out of him.

"I can't Naruto, I can't lose you too. Please don't go, I... You're all that's left. No one else can go, please!"

"It will be okay, Sakura-chan," He gently clutched her hand, she squeezed back with all the strength she had left. Holding on as if the warmth of his palm was all that held her existence together. "You can fix it all, I finished it. Go back Sakura-chan. Go back and save everyone."

"I... I don't think I have the strength left... Naruto-kun. Without you... Without Sasuke-kun and Kakashi-sensei... Tsunade-shishou... I'm not strong like you, Naruto-kun. I can't hurt this much and smile. I just can't!"

"You can do it Sakura, I believe in you. I believe you can change what has happened. What happened to the fierce pink-haired girl with the monstrous strength who decided never to give up? The one who trained under Baa-chan, who faced down an S-ranked criminal and walked away? Who healed hundreds of people, almost overdosing on soldier pills to keep on going?"

"Hah! Baka. What happened to her?! Hahaha! She watched as her shishou choked to death on blood and aged before her eyes.

She watched her sensei as he was impaled by living wood and his head then severed from his body.

She watched as the boy she once loved died of blood loss and chakra exhaustion.

And now? Now she's watching her best friend, all cut up and bleeding everywhere, slowly dying while she can do nothing, because she has no strength left and he can't even heal himself anymore.

All of their blood is on my hands. My clothing stained a muddy brown in it.

Shikamaru is catatonic. If he went back, I don't think he would live through it.

I don't even want to live anymore Naruto.

I don't want to live."

Tears streamed down her face, rolling off of her skin only to land on whiskered cheeks. Half of her was trying to keep the bubbling laughter from taking over. She wasn't sure what she thought was so funny. Just that the bubbly feeling was rising along with her desperate sobs.

A bright smile crossed his face, so out of place, but nothing that couldn't be expected of him. Of course, he would die with that idiotic grin plastered there.

"Don't worry about it Sakura-chan! It will be fine! You know why? Because you won't die.

I might be dying now, but that's okay. I know it doesn't seem like it, and it might be hard to get this, but if you go back then I won't die here like this.

You'll be able to see Baa-chan again, and Sasuke-teme, and Kaka-sensei, along with everybody else. 'Cause if you change what happened then nobody's gotta die, you know?

Even people that died long before the war can be saved, 'cause you already know the truth about everything!

You know who Tobi was. You know about the Akatsuki and about the war and about all the other stuff that happened. And hey! You might even be able to save Jiji and Ero-sennin too! So, it will all be okay Sakura-chan! I'm counting on you!"

"...Naruto... you dobe... even if I go back, it won't be the same! It won't be you! They won't have had the same experiences and they won't even know who I am! We're in our twenties and we've suffered far more than anyone! We've grown in ways they never will!

You won't be the baka that kept asking me out on dates and Sasuke won't be the boy I loved and Kakashi-sensei won't be the one whose always late because of black cats anymore! Ino won't be my rival and Iruka-sensei won't even be my sensei!

We have no idea how this is going to affect my body either! We don't know what will happen because it hasn't been tested and if it doesn't work it will all be futile! I'll lose everyone again and again and I just can't do it Naruto! I can't!"

"...Sakura-chan..."

"I'm so so sorry Naruto. If only I were stronger. If only I could heal you so you could go instead! You're so much better than me and get along with almost everyone! I would die in your place if I could Naruto!"

"...Sakura... If you don't go, it will all end anyways. We might not be the same people, but does that really matter?

You say you would die in my place, but you won't go back in time to save your comrades?

Those who break the rules and regulations are scum, but those who abandon their comrades are worse than scum! That's what Kakashi-sensei taught us!

You won't just be saving everyone Sakura-chan... You'll be giving them better lives!

Obito wouldn't have almost died and gave Kakashi-sensei his eye. Kakashi-sensei wouldn't have accidentally killed his friend. I might have grown up with parents and Itachi wouldn't have to kill his clan so Sasuke wouldn't be alone!

When I told you I finished the seal I wasn't lying! The reason it wasn't finished was because I didn't know how to give it enough power, but now I do Sakura-chan and I'm dying anyways, even if it's kinda slow and painful.

So, take me to the array Sakura-chan.

Back then, when Sasuke-teme left the village, you selfishly asked me to bring him back, no matter what. Even though I was still a kid and I was never able to do it.

So now it's my turn to be selfish Sakura-chan.

I'm asking you, please, go back. Change it for the better. Watch me grow up happy and become Hokage.

Become happy, Sakura-chan. Grow up and start your own family and be the best damn medic since Baa-chan herself!"

She watched him silently, the determined look in his eye never wavering.

He was right.

Of course, he always was good at setting people on the right track. At giving them strength when they thought they had none left.

She wasn't sure if she could do it. If she could watch the people she loved treat her like strangers. Yet he was still right.

"...I will do it. Only because of you. Because you are all I have left. Because this is my only chance to see you live and be happy, even if I might not be a part of your life. So, I need to know, Naruto, what does the seal need. Tell me. And don't you lie to me either."

"...The only way it would work is through sacrifice. A deal with the Shinigami. I'm dying anyways Sakura-chan and while my soul may be used for payment in this future, when you go back, it wouldn't have happened."

She heard shifting to the side and looked over.

Shikamaru was watching them.

His skin pallid, cheeks sunken from malnutrition, much like the rest of them, and the dark circles under his eyes prominent.

"Naruto... Will only your soul be enough? Will it send her far enough back? Do you have enough chakra?" He said, his eyes taking on a glint that she hadn't seen in years.

"My soul should be enough, but I'm not sure chakra-wise. Even Sakura doesn't have enough to assist."

"Use mine."

She looked at him, shocked. "Shikamaru..."

"Use. Mine."

"You might die Shika!" She said, fiercely.

"So? What does it matter if I die if my sacrifice can save everyone?

I'll tell you now, it doesn't.

You going back will save me as well... Save Chouji... Ino... Kurenai-sensei... Asuma-sensei... My... My dad.

We don't have much time. We're lucky that dying is taking as long as it is. He's probably not even got ten minutes left now. You've been talking for twenty.

You'll need an alias. You can't have the same last name as your parents.

You can alter your DNA right? You're a medical ninja, you must have read up on it some, especially with Sasuke defecting to Orochimaru. Use Naruto's. Try to only take the Uzumaki DNA though.

You can probably change your hair color to red easily. You can claim to be an Uzumaki. There won't be anyone to deny your story and DNA testing with a known Uzumaki could confirm it.

Take half of a soldier pill. It might damage your organs, but immediately doing the procedure as quickly as you can should reduce the damage. Naruto has some pretty sturdy DNA.

This will also give you a reason to keep a close eye on him, since you will be related."

"...I do know what you're talking about... But I don't know if I can do it in time.

I can try healing Naruto a little, I won't be able to save him, but I can make him last long enough to do the procedure and have him activate the seal..."

"You can do it Sakura-chan! Do ya need some of my blood? 'Cause I got plenty right here."

"...You... I don't even know how you can joke around right now!"

"Here." Shikamaru tossed her his Kunai pouch.

"There's some Nara soldier pills and rations along with weapons in there, All I have left.

You're going to have to get rid of anything suspicious. Remove and hide the plates of your headbands. Stick it in the lining of your pouch or something. Or even better, once you get there and have enough chakra, put it in a storage scroll etched into your skin. I know you helped Naruto develop this thing. So do it woman."

"Hai" Sakura got to work.

Splitting the soldier pill and healing what she could on Naruto and then using a diagnosis jutsu to analyze his DNA.

"Naruto, do you have anything that might have your dad's DNA on it? I need to know which strands need to be integrated."

"You bet I do. Here. It's my dad's headband... I managed to get my hands on it a while back... before Ero-sennin left to Ame..."

"Thanks." Taking the cloth, she analyzed it as well, there was a chance that there wasn't anything on it, but hopefully it would help.

She studied it closely, not thinking too hard about anything that was happening, her decision, Naruto's, Shikamaru's.

She was doing this for them.

There! It was really lucky, but there was a small patch of dead cells that matched part of Naruto's DNA. She moved quickly after finishing her last task. Working on separating the Uzumaki strands from the Yondaime's and integrating them with her own. It's an extremely painful process, but this pain was nothing compared to what she has already felt. Nothing compared to what she would do for the blue-eyed boy watching her intently.

Her pink hair turned darker, a deep shade of red. Not a blindingly bright color, but a slightly wavy burnt auburn.

He watched as her eyes turned darker, a deep forest shade, and her over all structure altering to somewhat match his own.

A smile quickly spread across his face yet again and as soon as she finished, he cheekily addressed her.

"Let's get this done! Nee-chan!"

"If you weren't dying right now Naruto I swear to Kami I'd knock you upside your head..." She growled. Slightly exasperated with her male teammate.

Shikamaru knelt, grasping Naruto's arm to help her support him as they made their way over to the seal array.

"Kami that hurts! Ne, Sakura-chan, Shikamaru, bring me over to that upper left portion will ya? That's where I gotta add in the new features, and hand me my tools outta my pouch."

Silently, they worked to assist him, it was another ten minutes before the array was now complete.

"Sakura, you should be arriving somewhere on the border of frost and lightning, which is where we are now." He got up and walked over to the remains of what used to be a tent. Grabbed a few scrolls, and walked back.

"These are the last of the good supplies and a map. It will be dangerous, you might be thrust in during the middle of another war.

It will be especially dangerous because of the relations between Konoha and Kumo in the past. Use this cloak to try to hide your features and don't spend any time with strangers.

You have a lot of obstacles to face between here and Konoha.

Once you get there, tell them your village was destroyed. That your only choice was to flea and that you're all that is left. If your body changes any then alter what I've just told you to the situation. Don't assume you're safe once you get there.

It will be troublesome, but you'll have to deal with Elder Danzo. I'm pretty sure Sai told you both plenty once Naruto was able to get that seal off of him."

"Hai."

"You ready Sakura-chan?"

"Hai, I am. Before you two activate it... I love you both. I will do my best to save you."

"...Troublesome woman."

"Heh, we love you too Sakura-nee-chan!"

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There wasn't a bright light, not that Sakura could see anyway.

One minute she was memorizing the faces of her comrades and the next she was engulfed in darkness.

The pain of such a technique swallowed her completely and her screams were so harsh she tried to muffle them with her palms.

The burning sensation filled her limbs and her eyes were closed harshly before the darkness changed to red. Light hitting her irises through her eyelids. But the pain did not relent.

She knew it was dangerous, that if she fell into unconsciousness it might just be the last thing she would do, but with how much her body was deteriorated it was fighting a losing battle.

Every part of her felt as if she were bathing in Sasuke's Amatarasu.

It was the only comparison she could think to make. However, she persevered. Determined not to let down her best friend. This anguish was nothing compared to the people she has lost.

Nothing compared to being washed in the blood of her loved ones as she failed to save each of them.

"This time," she thought fiercely, "This time, they will not die!"

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	2. Chapter 2

Wilted Efflorescence- Chapter 2

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When she woke, she was parched.

Not a normal parched, that you would feel after not drinking for a short amount of time, but a more desperate version that teetered on the edge of dehydration.

Her stomach clenched in its emptiness and twist with nausea.

Not that any of that was anything new.

Her head ached. Her muscles felt torn. But none of that mattered.

None of it mattered, because while she lay there with dust swirling around her and the night sky twinkling without a care in the world, her last friends ceased to exist.

It wouldn't be hard to claim her village destroyed.

Her village died with Naruto.

Yet she still lived.

She lived against her will.

She lived because it was his last wish and even though there was a gaping metaphorical hole where her heart was she had no choice but to continue.

Grimacing, she sat up. Slowly taking in everything around her and trying to view her newfound situation objectively.

Not being objective hurt too much.

Her limbs were shorter.

Extremely short.

She scowled as she realized that the process had reversed the rate of cell death.

Her body wasn't even made of the same cells as before.

The smell of fresh air, untainted by the blood of an unknown amount of corpses filled her nostrils along with the scent of decompositon covering her form. Her shorts and skirt no longer fit. Her shirt was more of a dress, so she hurriedly discard most of her clothing before rewrapping her chest. Her undergarments were too loose as well, so she took a Kunai and cut the sides before tying the material on the sides to her body for a better fit and slid the shirt back on. Her gloves were too large, but she was attached to them. They were a gift from Tsunade... her eyes watered at the thought of her shishou.

Quickly, she shoved the gloves into her Kunai pouch before using the excess material from her shorts to secure the pouch around her waist now that her thighs were too small.

She ignored the grime covering her from head to toe and reached for a ration bar and her canteen, filling herself up before looking around again to head out.

She looked down at her feet with a scowl. Her shinobi sandals would no longer fit either. Grabbing the excess bandages and ignoring the fact that they were a red brown color, she wrapped her feet. Leaving her toes to peak out slightly, she tied the material off at her ankles. Satisfied that her lower appendages were at least somewhat protected, she made her way. Determined to make it to Konoha as quickly as possible. The faster she fulfilled her word to Naruto, the quicker she would no longer have to suffer. She purposefully ignored her memories.

It had been three days before she actually reached the edge of the land of fire. Many times she had to hide her chakra and herself as to not be discovered. Years of war had mostly made that a subconscious thing, but she still put in the extra effort when she knew danger was near. She had not slept since she woke from the jutsu. She pushed herself at an extremely unhealthy limit. Forcing herself to practice and train while she ran. She ran and she did not stop.

She was scared to sleep. All of them had been. Her dreams were not dreams, but nightmares, filled with rotting corpses, loose intestines hanging from tents. Maggots squirming over and through exposed and rotting muscle. Shinobi of all ages missing limbs.

The worse was the ones including the people she knew. A dismembered head rolled towards her feet, silver locks clumped with rusty brown. Arteries spilling blood from the neck and an exposed esophagus. A bare face. It wasn't supposed to be bare. Where was the fabric. Where was the material? Not natural. Not natural. Blank eyes. Staring at nothing. Frozen in place until they popped from the decomposition and then never seen again.

She leaned against a nearby tree, breathing heavily before curling into a fetal position in an attempt to control her thoughts. Her small fingers dug harshly into her shins.

She couldn't take it any more.

She needed to find a stream.

Hyperventilating, she struggled to rush to the closest source of water. She was in fire country now. She knew it well. They all did.

An hour later and she was where she wanted to be. There were closer places but those places carried memories she did not want to relive. This one didn't.

Immediately, Sakura thrust her hands into the water, scrubbing, scratching, attempting to just get it off.

It wouldn't come off.

Her hands began to bleed as she cried.

She didn't realize she was speaking out loud while she scrubbed.

"No more. No more. Too many dead. I couldn't save them. No more. Why? Why won't it come off? I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I couldn't. I couldn't do it. I'm sorry."

Her voice rose in pitch as her sobs began to interrupt her speech.

Unfortunately for her, the noise brought attention.

Her stomach swirled with nausea and her throat had tightened on herself, but when she senses a few presences, she began to calm. She forced herself to continue her actions, but inside, she was relaxed. The familiar sense of an impending battle took over and she was no longer out of control.

She may be small, but she is still a veteran shinobi. Made that way from a one sided war that was filled with nothing but losses. Those that survived as long as she did... they couldn't be snuck up on that easily. Even if she was in the middle of a mental break down, she was still a shinobi, and no human in existence could sneak up on a veteran shinobi from the 4th shinobi war. They had adapted. They had to. There was no choice. Zetsu was the God of stealth. Ordinary senses would not help them survive against an army of Zetsu.

So when she sensed others in her vicinity, she pretended not to notice, waiting like a coiled cobra. Muscles relaxed, but still ready to tense and strike at the moment of weakness. Waiting for the enemy to falter. Waiting for her hands to once again be covered in fresh blood.

It was a normal sensation now.

The blood. It stayed. It didn't go away. It stained every bit of visable skin she had and her clothing was already dyed in it. Crumpled and stuff, but nothing she wasn't familiar with.

The longer she waited, the more confused she became. They weren't attacking. Why weren't they attacking? They're supposed to attack.

She began to drop her façade. There was no point in holding it up when it was unnecessary. She ran her hands through her hair. Strands of red catching in the open wounds made from her nails and sending a small sting through them. She turned to face the group behind her.

Instantly she regret her choice.

Three Konoha shinobi stood before her. One was an Uchiha. No one she knew, obviously, but the familial features and scowl still stood out and pierced through her. The other was a civilian, again, no one she knew, the final, which was a little odd of a pairing, was a Nara. Instantly Shikamaru's features crossed over this unknown shinobi and bile began to rise up her esophagus. So many memories. So much pain. It all crashed through her. Years of war flashed through her mind in an instant, but she still kept her face mostly blank.

The Uchiha spoke first.

"You're trespassing in the land of fire. Which in times of war can be punishable by death."

Immediately the civilian shinobi, lightly smacked her partner on the arm.

"Jeez, she's a kid. Can't you see she looks traumatized? Look at her? She looks like she's either gonna hurl or bolt. And she's covered in so much blood... obviously what she's wearing and carrying doesn't belong to her. It's not fit to her. It looks like everything she's wearing has been scavenged for her survival."

The Nara silently took in her appearance and glimpsed over at his comrades before addressing her.

"Tedious... who're you brat?"

She stayed silent for a fee minutes while the three shinobi stared her down.

"I'm Sakura. I'm not telling you my surname. K- Kaa-chan... she said it was dangerous to let people know..." She paused. Pretending she was trying to keep a straight face and failing. "I don't know how old I am or where I am... I just had to run. Run before they found me. She... she told me to run..." an image of Tsunade popped up in her mind as well as her biological mother, both dead, she felt the emotions take over. "They're dead. Dead. I couldn't save them. They made me leave. They bled out. So much blood." Her hands started shaking. "So many bodies. So much rot. When they came it was over. The enemy. They killed without mercy and I couldn't save them. I couldn't. No matter how hard I tried." Her breath began to speed up and her eyes glazed over. No longer seeing the Shinobi in front of her. "An unstoppable force. So many bodies. I was trained to save people but I couldn't I wasn't able to. So many dead. So many I couldn't save. Gone. Melting into the earth. Exposed flesh baking in the sun. Blood. So much blood. I was bathed in it. They all died and I lived. Why did I live why couldn't they live?"

Unknown to her the three shinobi were exchanging looks as well as quiet comments.

The woman frowned, "Poor kid. She's not even registering us as here right now. Looks like she's about to fall over."

The Uchiha stayed silent. Watching the hyperventilating child with grim understanding. It was war, after all. She was caught in the middle of it, too young to handle such a thing. Her village must have made the children learn what they could about medicine to take in refugees and then had been attacked. It wouldn't be the first time this has happened, and definitely not the last, but what she was describing was the worst case they had come across.

The Nara sighed audibly, "Looks like we might have to take her back to the village. Red hair is a rare trait these days, and she looks similar to Kushina-san. Might be an Uzumaki. It explains why she said she's not allowed to give out her surname... Oi, Akimi, try to knock some sense in her, she's not going anywhere in a catatonic state like that."

"I don't think that's a good idea... she might react violently." She grimaced but took a step forward regardless.

Immediately Sakura snapped out of it and refocused on the three in front of her.

Her jaw clenched as she realized she had once again lost herself in the abyss. If only there had been more time. Time to at least attempt handle the deaths of her comrades. Time to gain control over herself.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Releasing it slowly, her face relaxed as she cooly gazed at the shinobi before her.

"So, what is it that you want with me? Are you going to let me go, or take me with you?"

Akimi jerked slightly in shock. "Let you go? On your own? You look like you're barely functioning kid. That trauma you're carrying around with you will kill you out here. Look at you. You look like you've barely slept, barely ate, you've been moving for Kami knows how long but you aren't even sweating any more. I don't know about these guys, but I can't in good conscious leave a kid out here to die. You don't seem like you're a part of enemy forces, if you were, with that hair you'd stick out like a sore thumb. Plus, you might just have some family in our village. You come with us and after answering some questions and getting tested you might just have a new place to go."

Sakura snorted internally. Yeah. "Questions" like a friendly inquiry. Right, sure, and I'm an Uchiha. Hah.

It was nothing she couldn't handle though. Nothing they hadn't all delt with at some point in their lives. Ino made sure to help who was left with preventive measures. The longer the war had drawn out, the less people there were. The less people, the harder and longer and smarter they had to fight. With the increase of tactical measures and Zetsu prevention methods came a time where they'd be picked off one by one when they least expected it. Future strategies were leaked from interrogation and they were nigh prepared. So they learned. Jutsu were unavoidable if you were tied down, but that didn't mean you wouldn't be able to hide things if you knew how. Crafting memories and thoughts with the skill of the last and strongest Yamanaka in all of her generations. Each of them had been trained personally when they had the time.

The biggest hurdle since coming here was about to pass. Walking through those gates. Passing the chunin gate guards. Viewing a Hokage monument without Tsunade-shihou's face. Hell, even seeing the village actually _there_ was something she wasn't looking forward to. Just the thought of walking into the village made her nauseous.

She wasn't sure she could handle the dense population either. She wasn't used to a large amount of people. Hadn't been for years. The noise of village life was a distant memory associated with better times turned bitter now that she would never have that again.

But she had to.

 _"...So, it will all be okay Sakura-chan! I'm counting on you!_

 _...Those who break the rules and regulations are scum; but those who abandon their comrades are worse than scum! That's what Kakashi-sensei taught us!..._

 _...it's my turn to be selfish, Sakura-chan..._

 _...I'm asking you, please, go back. Watch me grow up happy and become Hokage!..._

 _...Let's get this done, nee-chan!..._

 _...Heh, we love you too Sakura-nee-chan!"_

Fresh pain shot through her system and she took a shaky breath.

She was as ready as she could be.

"Hai. I'll go with you."


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE: Wilted Efflorescence

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 **A/N: PLEASE READ: THANKS. From now on I think I'm going to ask you guys a favor. Music helps me write, so, if you don't mind, when you comment or review please leave music suggestions that fit the character or scene you've read and if you want to elaborate on why you chose that song please do so. I look forward to hearing from you guys. The main genre I listen to is rock music, however I do listen to all genres (I'm a bit obsessed with Melanie Martinez right now tbh, that and metalcore). The first few chapters of this story are mostly inspired by: My Demons, by Starset and a few random songs by Motionless In White. Who are your favorite artists and songs?**

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It would be a few hours before they arrived at the village. The four shinobi traveled in relative silence that was only occasionally interrupted by Akimi, who, out of all of them, couldn't tolerate the extended quiet.

While they traveled though, Sakura was being closely watched by the Nara shinobi. His calculating gaze took in her completely silent footsteps and almost invisible presence. He had allowed Akimi to rattle on about the child joining the village.

She was competent, but only a chunin.

The child may resemble Kushina, but she was far to skilled to be normal. Always on alert. Even in the midst of a mental break, she had immediately snapped out of it as soon as Akimi had stepped towards her. Instantly alert.

It was still in their best interests to take her to T&I. If her story proved true, then she would be an asset to the village...

Once she got some therapy.

He was pretty sure if it was true though, she would be sent to the Academy to mingle with her peers. Isolation for a child so young, and one that was traumatized at that, was definitely not a good idea.

From her appearance, she was maybe 5 to 7 years of age. He was leaning more towards somewhere in the middle.

He didn't think he'd ever see a child more traumatized than that Hatake brat after the whole White Fang fiasco.

Adding to that, her clothing was still soaked in copious amounts of now dry blood.

She didn't even notice that it was still there. Her hair was matted in multiple places and he wasn't even sure he wanted to know what or where the green smear on the too large shirt she was wearing came from.

He had an idea, but the thought made him queasy so he refused to think about it.

His jaw tightened slightly and he refocused on the trail ahead. They still had a ways to go before they arrived at the village and he would rather spend the rest of his time there on more pleasant thoughts.

Like the futon he could collapse in once he got back to the compound.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Sakura could feel her nerves being rubbed down to a fine thread.

She didn't know these shinobi. It didn't matter that they were from the leaf. She couldn't trust anyone. Idle conversation from Akimi wasn't really welcome, but it had provided much needed information.

The woman kept suggesting villages that had recently been destroyed in the war. She also rattled on about the 3rd Hokage, about anything really.

Sakura was surprised she hadn't been reprimanded for giving out information so freely.

At least it was a distraction. Sakura had never heard of a kunoichi named Akimi in her time, so unfortunately by the time "she" was to be born, she would most likely be dead.

Of course it wouldn't be her.

She was no longer Sakura Haruno.

The thought was far from pleasant and caused Sakura to repress a grimace at the thought that she technically no longer existed. The Sakura Haruno that may or may not be born would not turn out to be her.

A spike of jealousy spread through her, which was a bit surprising. However, when she really thought about it, she found it to be true. The Sakura Haruno that would be born in almost 20 years would get to be with everyone she once knew.

She was jealous of that Sakura because she would get what she could never have. That Sakura would get Naruto and Sasuke and the rest of the rookie nine and their sensei while she lived in the background watching.

The thought of her friends sent a fresh wave of grief through her. So strong it was almost crippling. In her pain she hadn't realized that she had actually stumbled slightly, making it the first sound she had made on their travel together.

It also drew that fact to the other shinobi who had yet to notice she was abnormally silent in her travel.

And that wasn't referring to her speaking.

Two calculating gazes settled on her feet and the Uchiha had activated his sharingan to study her.

She wasn't paying any attention to them though. She was too busy trying to force the sharp pain in her chest to just stop.

Her hands clenched tightly, nails dug into the palms of her hands causing blood to drip through her fingers and fall to the forest floor.

She wanted to forget.

She almost ached for someone to attack them. She wanted, no, needed to feel the familiarity of combat. The mind numbing and automatic responses, Obito's weapons piercing her skin. Her slicing at him with Sasuke's chokuto.

She was as familiar with fighting Obito as she had been sparring with Tsunade. And most likely vice-versa.

You can only fight someone so much before you both know each other's moves as well as you know your own.

As disgusted as she was by the thought of it, she could probably switch between her fighting style and his as much as she wanted to. The same went for many of her comrades, unless they had a special skill (like Naruto's ability to spawn kagebunshin in a number so large it would have killed anyone else) she could alternate as she pleased.

She had an arsenal that could only come from fighting side by side with shinobi from every village for years as their numbers dwindled to nothing.

She understood him though. And she hated herself for it. As the years had passed by, Naruto had managed to pry his reasoning's from him while they all fought him, Zetsu, and Madara.

She had also filled in the blanks.

He had been manipulated by Madara, not that he would listen when they tried to turn him.

Her hatred for those three was almost tangible.

But Obito... she hated him for more than just his actions.

She hated him because she could see herself doing the same thing he had.

Her obsession with Sasuke when she was younger. His obsession with Rin.

She hated him because she felt that in the same situation, she may have reacted similarly. She hated him because he made her hate herself.

Because she understood.

She understood so well it wasn't even funny. And for that she wanted all of them dead.

Unfortunately for her, she couldn't just waltz around and murder everyone before their actions affected her future self's future.

That was something he might have done.

She wasn't like him.

She wasn't.

She wouldn't let her hatred blind her morals.

...not that she had many left.

During the stress of the war, many shinobi and kunoichi had to find a way to lose themselves. To relax temporarily. A soak in a Hot spring was too dangerous, so they went for the next best thing.

Sex.

There were no feelings involved, just a desperate need to forget the war and feel another's touch.

Even Naruto hadn't been exempt of that.

She remembered crying when she had to preform an abortion for Hinata.

The quiet girl had become more withdrawn after that, and of course Naruto found out.

The next battle with Madara had been particularly bloody that day. Her team mate's expression had been filled with anguish as he fought.

Sakura knew he had always wanted a family.

What Madara had done to them all prevented him from getting that.

Sakura was too far gone to indulge in the comfort of another though. She had never been with another person, and she doubted she ever would.

Her anguish could not be washed away by mindless sex.

Things would have been so much more simple if they could.

Too many of her comrades had died. Too many she had tried to save and couldn't. It was to the point that she had begun seeing similarities between the living and the dead. Similar personalities. Similar facial features. Similar scars.

And everyone had similar organs.

Everyone had the same color blood.

Because of that the thought of touching anyone became nauseating. Everyone she tried to save died eventually.

Kakashi had told them he thought he was always the one who would live because that was how it had always been for him.

Sakura had a similar sentiment, except that as the medical ninja, she was the only one to live.

She had to live because she was the only one who could help the others survive longer.

And when Kakashi had died, that had really hit her.

She was now the only one who would live.

That had been two years ago.

Her body was still on autopilot as she was lost in her thoughts. Slightly behind the other shinobi as they traveled.

There was only about a half hour until the village would come into view.

That thought almost caused her to stop moving completely.

She didn't want to see it. She didn't want to see the gates, or the mountain, or the busy streets, or even the Sandaime's face. She hadn't seen him in person in about fifteen years. She hadn't seen the village itself as it was in about ten years. She hadn't seen the Hokage monument in eight.

It had been so long, and it was morbidly funny to her.

Not that the village was there or that she would see it again, but that she absolutely despised the idea of seeing a somewhat happy village filled with happy villagers.

A part of her wanted to lash out at anyone with even a small semblance of happiness.

To use her chakra scalpels to sever the muscles holding those smiles in place.

Another part of her, the part of her that existed in the days before all hope was lost, hates herself for feeling that anger.

Doesn't everyone have a right to their own happiness?

She doesn't know the answer to that question any more.

The closer they grew to the looming gates of Konoha the more tense her muscles became. Her body began to involuntarily twitch at the urge to run.

Her lungs stopped moving when the large structure was a stones throw away. The vaguely familiar sounds and smells assaulted her senses and it took every muscle in her body, every bit of control, not to flee. All she consciously felt was dread...

But deeper within her, in her subconscious, a frail and skeletal form twitched.


	4. Chapter 4

How could someone struggle to breath if they didn't have a body to breath with in the first place?

She felt weak.

It was understandable, of course. She had been gone for such a long time. It wasn't because Sakura was unhappy, which was obvious, it was because she struggled to take on Sakura's burdens.

Her hate was all consuming and eventually, caused her consciousness to be snuffed out like the flame of a burning candle. Drowned in wax and frozen in time until someone comes along and digs out the wick.

The image of the gate to Konoha dug out the wick and lit a flame of another type of despair.

Sakura was unaware of all of this though. She was unaware of Inner's struggle to move as the new emotions flood Sakura's mind. Slowly feeding her inner turmoil.

Insecurity. Hate. Anguish. Pain. Longing.

There was no happiness.

Inner did not represent her happiness.

In fact, inner represented her resentment and insecurity, a part of her that she despised that festered like an open wound once it became infected.

She's been infected so long she doesn't know what it's like to not be infected.

Infected with images of bloated corpses. The eyes of her comrades swollen too large to fit in their skulls any longer. Eyes that bloated and poked their way out, pale and unseeing as they stared into nothing.

Festering flesh swollen until their features were unrecognizable.

Blow air into your cheeks, puffing them up, and stick your tongue out at the same time, with your eyes bulging out as much as possible, and look in the mirror.

What you're looking at is what she sees. Except, unlike what you see, the images she sees are swollen at least five times the size as your own features. The images she sees are pallid, clouded eyes, tinted blue, white, and purple.

With each rotting corpse came even more despair and with each loss came more insecurity. So much so that eventually, Sakura's minds cape froze. A wasteland of a hospital and in its basement lay her deepest darkest feelings.

However, just because her mind scape froze in her despair, does not mean that things weren't added to it.

In fact, every single death of every single shinobi filled each room in the hospital. Each their own gory scene. Like a haunted house that no one wants to enter.

Thousands and thousands of rooms filled with corpses. The most painful ones were closest to the basement. The root of Sakura's mind and the reason inner was stifled for so many years.

Inner understood why Naruto sent Sakura back of all people. She understood that she was completely broken. The fact that she even existed in the first place was proof of the first small crack within Sakura's mind and that Naruto, with his uncanny ability to read people and push their buttons until they see it from his point of view, saw that the only way to save his last friend was to let her go.

While inner understood, she was still the part of Sakura that absolutely resented Naruto for his choice.

She resented every single shinobi she has met and would meet on this journey to save the futures of the ones she loved.

She felt so much resentment that she absolutely loathed this new Konoha.

And while she loathed it, Sakura had sworn to protect it.

And because of that Inner hated Sakura as much as Sakura hated herself.

Inner groaned as she moved. Attempting to sit up. Her bones (Does she even have bones? What is she? Does she have some sort of existence, some sort of body, even within Sakura's mind? Or is it just another portion of their insanity?) ached as her thoughts slowly grew clearer and clearer. Grimacing at the constant ache that she's had her entire existence.

(Pathetic. Worthless. Can't save anyone. Always behind. Shouldn't exist. You should be dead. Kill yourself. Bitch. You'll never be able to save anyone. You'll never save Naruto. Everyone will die again and it'll be all your fault.)

With each thought she wanted to cry out. To lash out at the mind she shared with Sakura, but she couldn't. Not yet anyway. She could barely move, much less speak.

(Look at that. Look at it. You see their faces? They no longer exist. You could have stopped them from dying. Hahaha. And Naruto. He has no idea does he? What you did. What you've done. Your fights with Obito. You're pathetic. All your friends thought you were fighting for your life. Stupid whore. You didn't want to kill him did you? He still lived. He lived and hurt them. And you allowed it. You could have killed him multiple times. You could have but you didn't. Did you ever think about fucking him? You did didn't you? What would Sasuke think? If you had screwed the man who killed him? You didn't, but that doesn't mean your body didn't react to him.)

No.

Inner cringed as the thoughts just kept pouring into her. She was Sakura, but she wasn't. Sakura was her, but wasn't.

She didn't have a choice. She couldn't kill him. She was trying. Every opening she had for the kill she went for, didn't she? Didn't she try to kill him? She thought she did.

Tears sprung to Inner's eyes and she slowly moved to wrap her arms around herself.

She missed the days when the only thoughts she had were about their stupid forehead.

Taking a deep breath, inner finally looked up. Taking in her surroundings. She was in a basement. The walls were cracked and some sort of dark liquid poured from them. There wasn't much light so her visibility was severely impaired. A small flame, the size of a kunai, was directly in front of her. Pulsing with Sakura's heart beat. It's color ranging from purple to blue to green and white. As small as it was, the amount of light it gave off was still almost non-existing. It wasn't even warm. The flame was a direct contradiction to its colors. Running her finger through it felt like sticking her hand in snow, but colder. Suddenly, she yelped. Silvery white chains sprung out of the flames, violently swatting at her, attempting to wrap around her and tighten around her flesh.

Immediately she scurried backwards, as far away from the flames that she could get. Her back hit the wall and sticky liquid flowed over her shoulders and down her arms. The scent was strong. Like a mix of iron and copper. She knew now that it was blood.

As soon as she figured out what it was, vast amounts poured over her, forming a puddle that she began to sink in. She tried to get out, but failed. The basement disappeared and she drowned in blood. Bubbles of oxygen released from her lungs and she struggled to swim to a surface, any surface, her body automatically following the bubbles while she tried to remain conscious.

Her hand broke the surface reaching into nothing and then falling back onto it. Chakra automatically latching on so she could pull herself out. As soon as she was standing, the sudden pool underneath her had disappeared. Leaving nothing. The only sign she had been drowning was the blood dripping from her body and forming small puddles on the cracked floor.

Breathing heavily she fell to her knees. Not bothering to take in her surroundings while she caught her breath.

(Look, look, hahaha. It's your best friend~ the blonde dobe. Choking on his own blood while you live. Hahahaha. Do you see it bubbling? The blood on his lips? Haha he looks like a dying fish. His mouth opening and closing. Isn't it funny? Blub blub. Sakura-ch-blub. Hahahaha. The number one unpredictable ninja. He's pretty predictable now isn't he? He's going to blow bubbles of blood and then his eyes will glaze over and stare at nothing and his heart will stop and there's nothing you can do about it. You left him like that. He died with your name on his lips. It's pathetic isn't it? "Sakura-chan, Sakura-chan," it's been like that sense you've known him. It's also still kind of fucking hilarious isn't it? Him dying calling out for you when you're the one that murdered his unborn kid. Hahaha)

Inner closed her eyes tightly. Her hands flew up to her temples as she tried to make it stop.

She breathed in slowly and then opened her eyes.

She instantly regret it.

In front of her was Naruto. Bloodied and swollen like so many other rotten corpses she's seen. Eyes unseeing but burrowing into her accusingly. His mouth was gaping, and just like the thoughts said, bubbling with blood.

She threw herself backward. Feeling the extreme urge to hurl as fresh paint pierced her soul.

(Your fault. It's your fault.)

Thousands and thousands of memories bombarded her. Causing her to scream as the pain consumed her. Each memory coming with its own set of thoughts and accusations.

Over and over they replayed. Twisting her thoughts and desires into something macabre.

When it was finished, everything went dark. The room emptied. The walls and floors were covered with blood. The wall in front of her formed a whirlpool. The blood swirling at an alarming rate until it formed a perfect circle. Inside that circle was a mirror.

Cautiously, she stepped forward, her reflection slowly coming into view. She no longer looked like Sakura Haruno once did. Her hair was a deep auburn, her entire body was thin, skin sunk in. Multiple areas were hollow and she could see her ribs. She wore no clothing. The sight before her was nothing but a skeleton with skin. She reached towards the image, pale fingers shaking and slightly blue, and stroked the mirror.

Right when her skin came into contact, her body began to fill out. Her fingers no longer looked like bones and slowly the rest of her followed suit. Her skin became smooth and the image before her soon showed a fully grown woman. Her breasts were full and plump. Abdomen taught. Her hair shone slightly. Her hips filled out and curved.

She smirked and the image in front of her did the same.

She couldn't wait until they aged enough physically.

A sadistic grin spread across her beautiful features as she thought towards the future.

Konoha wouldn't know what hit them.


End file.
